|
|
Post by murasakihato on Aug 4, 2007 11:46:24 GMT -5
Okay this is a whole line of things about me people will never believe... And only one person on this site knows all of it.
1. I hate my life, i wish I was dead.
2. I am jealous of all my friends especially Aurora.
3. I've been forcefully abused in many brutal ways.
4. I've done drugs at the age of 7 or 8 (can't remember) for three years
5. I've done alcohol at the same time I did drugs...for three years
6. I did cigs for a month at the age of 11
7. I wish I looked like Aurora in person.
8. I hate my whole family and wish i could just die.
9. And las but not least I have a secret crush on a person on this site, and It is driving me insane not telling anybody!
And this is only half of my hidden feelings...but if I dare say more, I might loose control.
|
|
|
|
Post by sacta on Aug 4, 2007 16:23:53 GMT -5
I don't know if anything I can say might help, but maybe you should try to hang on and relax. I think you are about my age when I went through the very same thing. See, people messed with me in Junior High School for being fat. Not to tell I am not all that out going so I hadn't much friends.
Actually, what helped me was seeing that I DID have friends, and now I know they are true friends, not just the guys you go out with to hang out, they are TRUE friends. Also, practising taekwondo helped me a lot. Not like I am a sex symbol now, I am still ugly as all friggin' hell and chubby, but at least I am okay with my body now, and some people say I am cool. I don't consider myself cool, I might be the biggest loser on Earth, but it feels good when they tell me that.
So, maybe you should try to find an activity that truly attracts you. Also, about the other person on this site, keep in mind that this is not the real world. You might never meet that person in real life, unless you already know each other. I did go through love problems myself too not too long ago, when I was in North Carolina ^^ I was so depressed I felt like hitting my head against the wall, but everything is fine now and at leat we are friends. It was the first time I fell in love so it was quite tough, and it was even tougher because she liked me too. Yet it just wouldn't work.
So that's pretty much it, like the song says: Always look on the bright side of life.
|
|
|
|
Post by murasakihato on Aug 4, 2007 16:33:58 GMT -5
Uh... okay, I understand the internet deal and the "need friends support" But that isn't my problem.... My problem is just the opposite...
Everyone thinks I'm so cool, hot, smart, and can do anything I want... But the fact is i wanna be just like everyone else and have someone to look up too. I mean... i can't look up to my parents... my fathers or idiots who can keep their promises and my mother just isn't the same since she quit her job...I moved so I have no body to talk to when my internet goes down. And there are a few other things too like
10. I'm fourteen and afraid of the dark.
11. I hate lightening
12. I'm totally freaked everytime there is a tornado watch on the tv
13. Everyone looks up to me when i feel it should be the other way around...
Like I said, I hate my life, I wish I was never born... and not very many can relate.
|
|
|
|
Post by murasakihato on Aug 4, 2007 16:40:41 GMT -5
Aurora...
SEE WHAT I MEAN! EVERYONE FUCKIN LOVES ME! I HATE IT! I HATE IT! I HATE IT!
Aurora call me I'll give you my new number...
|
|
|
|
Post by murasakihato on Aug 4, 2007 16:49:55 GMT -5
Thanks for the fanfic pic... GOD!
|
|
|
|
Post by murasakihato on Aug 4, 2007 17:20:39 GMT -5
...That's it... I can't handle it anymore... I'm going to go get the nife under my bed and kil the being of no purpose
|
|
|
|
Post by micheal on Aug 4, 2007 17:23:40 GMT -5
If you two go i go....
|
|
|
|
Post by undecided on Aug 4, 2007 17:25:37 GMT -5
I'm already gone...
|
|
|
|
Post by sacta on Aug 4, 2007 17:25:40 GMT -5
Well, being depressed because you are too cool is... original... Anyway, yeah, maybe instead of so many friends that butter you up you need someone who actualy listens to you. I would, but as you know I can't ^^' IRL I am like the steriotipical gay guy who hangs out with girls >_> They trust me and all because according to their opinions 'I am not like the other guys', but they would never get on a relationship with me, like that dude from the diary of Bridget Johnes, the only thing being is I am not gay... I think!  |
|
|
|
Post by micheal on Aug 4, 2007 17:26:30 GMT -5
I mean killing yourself blackfire...
|
|
|
|
Post by undecided on Aug 4, 2007 17:27:41 GMT -5
So...
|
|
|
|
Post by murasakihato on Aug 4, 2007 17:28:40 GMT -5
I am so sorry... I've made a big deal about this and it really isn't right... I wish I could erase it all...
|
|
|
|
Post by sacta on Aug 4, 2007 17:28:44 GMT -5
WOW! A lot happened while I was posting! I won't say I would kill myself if you did (I am way too cowardly), but please don't do it. Seriously, I also thought of killing myself when I was fourteen. I bet you will get over it.
|
|
|
|
Post by murasakihato on Aug 4, 2007 17:30:07 GMT -5
. . . I'm so sorry
|
|
|
|
Post by murasakihato on Aug 15, 2007 17:00:56 GMT -5
I'm cute... wow... I've re-read this and I just realized I got more friends than I can handle...
|
|
