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Post by hexencreed on Jul 24, 2007 11:48:47 GMT -5
Ailyn awoke with a dry throat and hard, crusted lips. She rubbed her dull, squinting eyes, and sat up. It took far more effort than it should have, and she sat hunched over, breathing heavily, sucking in the hot desert air even though it scratched her throat with its burning dryness. Her once-glossy chestnut hair was greasy and lank, a sand-encrusted tangle straggling over her shoulders. Her skin was red and sore, scabbed with untreated sunburn. She had lived like this for days now, though she did not know how many. Being stranded in the desert had made her lose all track of time, and even of day and night. She did not choose when to sleep, but simply collapsed unconscious whenever he walked for too long. Meals and clean, cold water were an unrealistic dream. All she had to eat was the worms and crabs she sometimes found in the sand, and all she had to drink was the adic-tasting water that spurted from the cacti when she slashed them with her rusty, blunt knife. It was all she could do to walk on, ever searching for an escape from the shifting sands that had become her prison. Coughing, Ailyn stood, swaying a little, and stared through slitted eyes at the setting sun. She could see a shadowy figure... was it real? Was that silhouette of a man yet another mirage? Or had she finally found an escape?
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Post by Yasu on Jul 24, 2007 12:24:57 GMT -5
Wow, very well written. The details are very good as well as the punctuation and the grammer. We welcome you to Garendal...
...Accepted.
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